Description:
vrooooom - LiveJournal.com
Contents:
something is wrong with me. i don't sleep and i never have an appetite, i'm always sick and nervous and scared. nothing feels real, it feels like things feel in a dream. especially driving. and going places and doing things. and working. or like a video game. i think everything i do is a bad decision.
i just noticed my irish ring was the wrong way and i got nauseous. it looked bigger than usual when i turned it around and i got worried. help.
tomorrow is st. patrick's day.
i'm definitely irish.
The snow is getting to be a little bit too much, I think. But that could always just be me and my silly opinions. What on Earth am I thinking? Too much snow! Proposterous!
All insanity aside, my hands are very cold and my neighbor moved my car from the bottom of my driveway where I parked and emergency-braked it after realized there was no hope of getting poor Jesus up the hill. He then proceeded to put it in his driveway across the street, snowblow our driveway, and then put Jesus in his proper place underneath the neglected basketball net. Thank you Mr. and Mark Tokarz, you are wonderful. Now I can leave for work at 7:30 without any worry at all. Woop!
Davis Hall at Westfield State is haunted. I'm scared. I didn't put Davis on my residence form at all. There were spaces for four choices and I put every other hall that's open to freshman instead. I'd be nervous if I even got put into Dickinson, but Dickinson is fourth on my list so let's hope it doesn't come to that. And let's also hope to god that my roommate isn't a lunatic or a whore. Or Little Miss Highschool. Or anything. I hope she either gets along with me really well or hates me and moves out. That would be fantastic. I could hang any curtains I pleased and listen to Jimmy on my iPod all I wanted. Maybed I'll change my car's name to Jimmy. Its mostly composed of new parts anyways, thanks to the motherf**king dealer we got it from. Roarrr.
p.s.
My dad returns from Iraq in four weeks.
Four weeks til I have a dad again.
Four weeks til I get a new iBook.
Four weeks til we sue the dealer and I pay off my car loan with the resulting money.
Four weeks til f**king.. April.
It is all about Jimmy Eat World. If I haven't said it yet (or enough!!), they're my all-time favorite seven years running, hands down.
p.s. Hair cut.. Shoulder-length & pretty. Photos soon.
I am sick. Sick as a dog? Whatever.
Last night the cold medicine made me have another insane dream about this weird highschool place. Except in this one I left the school to go to dreamFitzgerald's and dreamPeaberry's to meet Jack and Kurt... So I went and I guess it was Valentine's Day or something but it was really warm because we were all outside in the parking lot with our awesome cars and some kid from Fitzgerald's came over and was like "here" and gave me some yellow flowers in a little vase and I was like "thanks.." Then I was like "okay thanks, byeeee" and went over to Kurt and Jack with them but Kurt was all upset because I took them.. It was just a big mess. I think it means I need to get better and not take cold meds before bed.
I keep skipping English and math but I just don't care. Whateverrrr
My car is home <3
I covered the seats yesterday before going to eat Indian for the first time with Ally, Krysta, Al, and Kurt and then to Beauty and the Beast at Simsbury High. The food was different, but not bad... The show was amazing. I'm jealous of Simsbury, I almost wish I could have gone there just to do theater. They have a summer program. If its free and they're doing a show that's not 42nd Street I'm totally there. Yes.
I've been working too much lately. I have to leave for work in three minutes, as a matter of fact. Working so much and being quite uncomfortable with my new schedule with school and work and doing stuff is making me cranky. I apologize.
I want to die.
Everyone hates me because I'm the most f**king stupid person in New England.
procrastinate
v. procrastinated, procrastinating, procrastinates
To put off doing something, especially out of habitual carelessness or laziness.
To postpone or delay needlessly.
I have a paper due this past Friday to finish up for highschool so I don't fail my writing class. I need to get all of my papers together for my final exam in highschool ever tomorrow. I need to clean my f-ing room. I need to burn the Killers cd for Ally. GODDDDDD I have so much to do, but I'm not worried or stressed about anything at all. Not even the fact that my mom hates me right now. Rarr.
When I wake up I'll be another year older.
Apparently myspace changes your age for you, so I guess that's pretty cool. I'm glad I have one exam and then the erest of the day to myself in all of my legally-adult glory! I'm finally getting my eyebrow pierced despite my mom telling me she doesn't want it (thank god for deciding to cut my bangs.. she doesn't have to see it if she doesn't want to?) and a tattoo on my kelectoes (lowerback/butt, basically. I'm not trendy enough to get one in the middle though so its going on the side I think.) aaaand I'm buying p**n and cigarettes and then not smoking them. And I'm gonna open a new bank account and close my other one at People's because they suck. And I'm going tooooo Amici with Kurt and Jack and maybe Allie and my mom.
I'm obsessed with my ipod. I listen to it all over campus when I'm walking to class and back to my car and stuff. I think everyone thinks I'm an a*****e. That's okay, because I am.
I'm adding Composition to my schedule at NCCC. Tuesday nights from 6:30 to 9:30. I guess that means I'll be at Kurt's on Tuesday and Wednesday nights :) It also means I'll get to write something, thank God, and I have a good reason for wanting an iBook! <3
Um, last full day of highschool.
My car (Jesus) died in the middle of rt. 10 on Saturday during the huge blizzard and it sucked. The AAA towtruck didn't come for like 2 hours.
the police pushed Jesus to safety, phew!
+ my new screenname is x timesnewromance hehe
I love going to my livejournal calendar and seeing 2005, 2004, and 2003 there. I love livejournal.
Here I am again, its 1:30 and I'm awake. Biiiiiiiig surprise. This is becoming a very bad habit.
Stash is going down.
This is what I get for taking honors Civics. I have no problem in the class, I've been getting B's. However, we have to write a paper about The Patriot Act and I would rather reinact my Saturday night 25 times than write this. Gah!
I.P.P.: I Play Polo. Yes!
You know, I should be enjoying myself in highschool as much as possible these last couple weeks. My camera should be out all the time and I should give hugs and Hershey Kisses to everyone. I guess I feel like I didn't make enough memories in highschool so I need to cram a lot in now.
I'll admit it: I really liked highschool while it lasted.
Sometimes it was just too much, and a lot of the people here make me want to vomit, but its really just a ridiculously fun place if you know how to do it correctly. For intance, right now I'm sitting in my gym teacher's office on her computer because the gym teachers love me (and I love them back) and let me do whatever because I write funny class make-up articles for them and I play gym sports as hardcore as I possibly can. And my teams always win. Always. I think I can honestly say that school is one of my favorite places to be. If I was doing senior year like a normal student, I would have like 50 million study halls every day and then I could say that for real this is my favorite place, but since I'm taking two Englishes, Civics, secret math, environmental science AND gym all at the same time, the level of love is decreased a little bit.
I think I'm one of those people who will grow up and do absolutely nothing. I'll sit around and write about stuff and send it to newspapers begging for them to send me money in return for my work but they never will. I just don't want to be anything at all. Maybe I'll be the new Snapple lady. Kurt knows all about that.
I'm really sick of school, thank god its over soon. I just want my work to actually go towards something. Like college work goes to getting a job. The work I'm doing in highschool right now is going to get me nothing because I already college apps in. Grarrr.
Are you gonna live your life standing in the back looking around? Are you gonna waste your time? Gotta make a move or you'll miss out. Someone's gonna ask you what it's all about. Stick around nostalgia won't let you down.
Now all I need is just to hear a song I know.
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine.
<3 I loved you even through the Bleed American sellout period, Jimmy.
if the perfect spring is waiting somewhere, just take me there
Jesus was literally an ice cube this morning; photo opportunity, duh.
So, that's all.
Wow, I just lost a fantastic entry. Motherf**ker!
Anyway, I'm currently drowning myself in low-carb vanilla ice cream and the entire fifth season of Sex and the City, pain-killing my lack of wisdom teeth pains away. An hour ago I was sitting in this same bed, drowning in my own effing tears because my lack of wisdom teeth has been creating a lack of substance in my diet lacking which, let me tell you, has been hell. I have to eat squishy stuff that I don't have to chew, like Jell-o and Ramen aaaaand other things that I don't want to think about right now because it makes me nauseous like, f**king, ice cream and warm (not hot, I love hot food!) pasta that's been cut up into bite size pieces that my forwards teeth can handle.
I want to die.
And I feel awful for being mean to Kurt at Wendy's just because I couldn't chew my chicken and he was enjoying the side caesar salad I've been craving for the entire day and a half of this hell. I couldn't help myself afterall, my side was the baked potato with chives. *sigh* When this is all over I'm going out for a four-or-five course dinner with Kurt. And I'm going to eat my freaking face off.
This last episode of the fifth season of Sex and the City is the episode that turned me on. Bitsy von what's-her-face's black-and-white dress & chunky green necklace was a sign. It said, this show is for you. Watch it. And now I am, obsessively. I love it, goodnight.
Oh yeah, welcome 2005 and my wishes for a happy new year to everyone.
Countdown to my birthday is 23 days. I would like a winning lottery ticket for my present, please. Thanks.
Before vacation we got our progress reports from school. My progess in math said I was failing. I had to make up two quizzes for him and when he calculated my grade for progress reports he put both quiz grades in as zeroes. So I made them up before vacation but apparently Mr. Randzio didn't feel like correcting the two quizzes I had made up over the vacation so when I asked for them yesterday he only had one for me and corrected the second for me last night. Those two brought me up to a B- and that's not including all the make up work I did last night (can you say A?). I really wish he had actually included the work I gave him when he told you I was failing because then what he said could have actually been accurate. Interesting how these things work.
Conclusion: I hate secret math.
Like, a lot.
BLAH LJ DELETED MY ENTRY
the short version, minus captials:
on new years eve me and kurt are party hopping.
jackie and matt's apartment
to: one of kurt's friend's party in ...tarriffville? or something?
to: meag's to end the year and rock out with my pirate-core band. hell yes.
</3 2004 goodbyeeeeee
I have no friends, apparently. If we aren't hanging out every night this upcoming week, I might shrivel up and die.
Sometimes I think to myself, "Caitlin, you are completely insane."
Then I want to throw up.
Because I always feel like it.
But then again, its 12:30 and I can't sleep.
I want like a million comments by Friday or this journal is going away or maybe friends-only. So comment or else.
Or else you'll never know what's going on with me, you'll never get to read my witty banter in the middle of the night, and I won't have a livejournal for you to read anymore. Won't that suck for you? So comment, please :)
Home
|
|
