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Martial arts for the philosophically inclined - LiveJournal.com
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According to Firefly, there's a special layer of hell reserved for child molesters and people who talk in the theater. I would humbly like to suggest the following additions:
* People who come in to a restaurant for a full meal at ten p.m.
* People who complain that their cappuccino has too much foam.
* Adults who behave like b***hy tweens towards each-other.
Fringe
I've been catching up on Fringe season 4. I wasn't that struck with this season initially, I found it all a bit meh. I wasn't connecting with the characters the way I used to, everyone seemed really miserable (think BSG season 3 vibe) and I just found myself not caring. The episodes after the mid-season break though? My reaction can be summed up as follows:
I'm veering wildly between squealing over the arc-plot and sobbing over the characters and all the feels they give me. Also, to the people whining that Peter doesn't get enough to do this season? SHUT UP, he is the lynch-pin of this season. Seriously, are we watching the same show? The whole season's been Peter-this, Peter-that, Peter Peter Peter Peter Peter.
One thing though. Needs moar Astrid. We can never have too much Astrid.
The big news today is...
The Boy has cut his hair. The Boy HAS CUT HIS HAIR. It's like, short and shit. I don't know what to make of this. My boss came up to me when I came in and said, "Your boy looks beautiful! If I was a girl..." I don't know what to make of that either. I guess it looks nice but...god damn. The long hair is gone. I feel I should take a moment for the Lost Hair.
In fannish news...
Here we have James Raynor, rebel leader from Star Craft...
And here we have James Raynor, Republic ally from Star Wars The Old Republic.
Really, LucasArts? Really?
Yes, I was doing an image search for James Raynor, DON'T JUDGE ME.
So for the last couple of weeks I've been over-worked and ill. The two may be related. I've been sniffling and coughing through work then crawling home and into bed. Or under duvet on sofa.
It's kinda bizarre, it's been ridiculously busy but now the January sales have wound down, it's so quiet. It's hellish when it's busy but at least the time passes quickly. I think time slowed to a glacial drip today.
I need to get back into internet land. I think this is the longest I've ever gone without being surgically attached to my laptop. It's...odd.
Since that meme informed me that I really need to start updating more, I guess I should update, huh?
So what's new with me? I've got a wee job at a restaurant to tide me over until something that actually applies my qualifications comes along. And I really do hope something comes along, my aching, 11 hours working feet are telling me I need a desk job.
Christmas was lovely. The Boy and I went to the parentals, my brother came up, 'twas nice. My haul was good; oodles of PS3 games from Martin, ridiculously cosy jammies and dressing gown from mum (which I am wearing now and never want to take off), Game of Thrones t-shirts and a copy of The Owl Who Was Afraid of the Dark (bit of a random choice from my Uncle but it did elicit a very loud and slightly teary "Awwwwwww!" from me, which was probably the desired result) and my brother gave me his old desktop. I've wanted a new desktop for ages now, and while his isn't bang up to date, it's still a million times better than the one I have. It'll run Star Craft II and that's all that really matters to me. He also bought me Skyrim for the PS3 but Martin got me that too. I think I'll trade it in for Space Marine.
Dammit, why do I have to work? I have games to play, don't they realise these things are important?
Speaking of "Dammit, why do I have to work?" I'm working on Hogmanay. Bumholes.
Edit: Oh yes. Christmas this year was a Dry one.
End of year meme: Post the first line of the first post of each month
Doing this meme made me realise that I have really sucked at updating lately. New Year resolution: Post to LJ more, even if it's random shit.
January: Happy New Year all!
February: I was going to post about drunken, happy funtimes that I had at a party on Saturday (I won't talk about the raging hangover on Sunday) but I'm not going to. Instead I'm going to rant.
March: My uncle's getting another dog, that didn't take long did it?
April: I has a ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92) lanyon in my abode as of tonight and it is wondermous.
May: My brother came up for weekend so I went back to the parentals to see him and there was much geeking out, over philosophy, religious history, Battlestar Galactica, Dr.Who and Game of Thrones.
June: I just got retweeted by Dara O'Briain. That's pretty much made my night.
July: *DAVOS IS ALIVE, OMG HE IS ALIVE AND HE'S GOING OFF TO FIND RICKON, MOTHERf**kING RICKON, RICKON'S ACTUALLY GETTING A PLOTLINE AND IT INVOLVES DAVOS, MY BB DAVOS, WHAT THIS I JUST-
August: Followers of Fred "God Hates Fags" Phelps are coming to Aberdeen to picket outside a local church that had the temerity to install a gay clergyman.
September: This has upset me quite a bit. I don't usually get that affected by stuff like this but I guess it reminds me of my family and the crap they went through because of this industry.
October: Nearly 37 hours 2692 zombie kills later I've finished Dead Island
November: I'm going to do my usual post-holiday routine of starting with a rant and promising happy updates later.
December: **Doing this meme made me realise that I have really sucked at updating lately.
*Spoilers for A Dance With Dragons. Highlight to read.
**Layers upon layers, we need to go deeper, the meme is collapsing, MEMECEPTION!
Heading up North for a week, we're doing the rented caravan thing instead of the tent thing this time (I foresee rain and much freezing off of asses). We're planning on going to the Spey Bay whale and dolphin centre, do a bit of the Speyside Way, and go to the Baxter's centre. I'm not sure what I'm planning to do there but I'll probably just stand around and smell the jam being made and a whole lot of loafing about.
I might have wi-fi access when I'm there (depends how much it costs/if it costs extra), so I may be around.
Later peeps!
Utterly random rant.
I know I've ranted about Florence + The Machine before but this is really bugging me today for some reason so I really want to get this off my chest. Don't mind me.
Dodgy singing and the music press' ridiculous fawning aside, I just can't get past the lyric for "Rabbit Heart.:"
"This is a gift // It comes with a price."
No. NO. NO No, no, no, no. NO!
That line makes no sense, no sense whatsoever. No, it's not antithesis, it's not an oxymoron IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY GODDAMN SENSE ON ANY LEVEL. If something has a price, by definition, it cannot be a gift. End of. If something comes with a price then that automatically makes it a transaction, which must be bilateral at least, but gifts must be unilateral, free of obligation on the part of the receiver.
Ah, I hear you say but what about when you give someone a present but then you can take it back if the receiver behaves inappropriately, like taking back an engagement ring. NO. These are not gifts because they are given on condition of a contingent, future event happening, if said event (such as marriage) does not take place, the item can be taken back. It's not a gift.
No, don't try to tell me it's deep and symbolic, NO. It's a completely unintelligible sentence. "This gift has a price," is like saying, "This bachelor has been married for five years." f**king analytic truths, how do they work?
And don't start with the King Midas references, that was a curse, not a gift.
God, it irritates me.
Dead Island ramble.
Nearly 37 hours 2692 zombie kills later I've finished Dead Island (well, the first play through. I can totally see myself going back to play as a different character or give co-op mode a whirl).
I'll kick off with the negatives before I start gushing. First of all, the difficulty curve is frakked. I like the idea of co-op being drop-in, drop out whenever you feel like it (as opposed to a dedicated co-op mode) but that means the difficulty has to be the same for single player and co-op. I'm guessing that's fine for co-op but if you're in single player, prepare to die a whole lot. I died 182 times in this game. Okay, it doesn't matter that much, you just get a GTA-style respawn and you lose some cash but it does get frustrating (especially if you've been saving up for a sweet weapon mod). It gets especially frustrating if you respawn in the middle of the exact same mob of zombies that killed you in the first place.
Which brings me on to my next point; what is up with the respawn points? Is it just me or were they completely random? Sometimes it would drop me off a few meters away so I could get my bearings before getting with the zombie-skewering, sometimes it would spawn me very many meters away so I had no idea where I was in relation to where I died and like I said, sometimes it would respawn me in the exact same spot so I could die all over again. The worst example I can think of was during the quarantine zone in Moresby. I stuck to the rooftops to keep the Infected concentration down but I wound up dying anyway. During the respawn countdown I was just thinking, "Please don't respawn me on the ground, please don't respawn me on the ground..." Yep. I respawned on the ground, got immediately jumped by about half-a-dozen infected, died in two seconds flat. I respawned again in the same spot but this time, I hit the sprint button and made a sphincter-clenching dash for the nearest ladder.
Some of the fetch-quests are mind-numbingly stupid. "Please, run across this zombie-infested city to bring me a gun so that I might shoot my wife's rapist!"
Okay, first of all? This rapist guy is probably already dead, or among the walking dead, what part of zombie apocalypse don't you understand? Secondly, why are you sending me across town to get something I already have? b***h please, I have a gun right here, just use that one. Gah.
Okay, on to the positives.
First up, I think many of the criticisms leveled at it are a little unfair, or at least, I didn't think these when I played, maybe it's a Your Milage May Vary sort of thing. For instance, I never found the combat repetitive or boring. I've been playing nearly forty hours now and I'm still not bored of timing it just right to lob off an Infected's head before it can get its mitts on me. I still cackle with glee when I hack off a Thug's limbs one-by-one so it can't hit me. It's just too much fun. It's gory as hell (this may be the goriest game I've ever played) but I don't think I'd be satisfied if I hacked off a zombie's arm and blood didn't spurt everywhere like a fountain. Also, there's so many different weapons to try out, you can mix it up to keep it fresh. Also, the zombies level up with you so it's always a challenge. Even 3 or 4 bog-standard Walkers can cause you grief if you don't pay attention or don't choose and time your attacks wisely. Oh and running zombies down with a car? Never gets old.
I've heard complaints about the lack of variety of zombies. I heard one gamer say it's like Left 4 Dead only with one type of zombie. Well that's just bollocks. You've got:
Walkers: Classic, Romero-style shamblers. Pretty much cannon fodder but if they surround you, you could be in trouble.
Thugs: Big, hulking shamblers, they do a lot of damage, two hits and you're dead. However, once you get the hang of cutting off their limbs, these are a lot of fun to menace. Seriously, you can get the arms off, then go for the legs, Black Knight style.
Infected: 28 Days Later-style, ragey, fast f**kers. I hate these things. One or two I can cope with, if you time it just right you can decapitate them before they reach you but any more than that, you get swarmed, they interrupt your attacks and your health is gone before you know what's happened. They're just too fast.
Floaters: They look totally disgusting and they seem scarier than they actually are. Their vomit attack (yes, they have a vomit attack, lovely) doesn't cause that much damage and once you attack they go down fairly easily.
Rams: Enormous, strait-jacketed, Hannibal Lector-masked crazies who charge you and bowl you over. These are theoretically easy to kill; you just dodge when they charge, let them run into a wall, hack away at them, repeat until they die. However, because the L2 button on the Dualshock controller is crazy-sensitive, I'd often end up kicking when I should have been dodging, you just need to brush that button for the kick command to go through. One fun thing to try is if you're facing off against Walkers and a Ram, position yourself so the Walker is between yourself and the Ram, then the Ram will kill the Walker for you when he charges.
Butchers: They look hideous and I suppose their sharpened, bone-stump arms are meant to be scary but eh, I didn't find them any more difficult than a standard Infected. Plus, I only ever seemed to go up against them one-on-one so they don't really live up to the hype.
Suiciders: Very easy to kill if you have a gun but damn, they're creepy and kinda sad since you can clearly hear them saying "Help me," if you get close enough (just don't get too close, lest they explode). Oh and never ram these guys with your car. Bad things happen.
Thirdly, I've heard bellyaching that it isn't scary enough. I sort of disagree. The gore isn't scary, it's more satisfying than anything else but there were definitely bits I found very unsettling. Moresby (the city level) in particular. It was so gloomy and depressing to start with, so add in killer zombies and you have a crapsack environment to end all crapsack environments. I didn't find the resort that scary because I've never found brightly lit environments unsettling (the hotel on the other hand was not fun. Too dark. Too many corners). I found the jungle and prison stages a relief after Moreseby. I really didn't like Moresby. Too dark, too gloomy, too many corners and alleyways where you could be jumped unawares. In fact, I'll just come out and say that I found the Moresby quarantine zone pants-wettingly scary. I was also incredibly creeped-out by the City Hall level after you return from the sewers. To see this formerly "safe" zone turn into a gore-strewn hell-hole was pretty gut-wrenching for me (especially as it's kind of your fault). After that I had visions of returning to the lifeguard tower to find bits of Sinamoi splashed all over the concrete (I'm glad that didn't happen, I sort of loved Sinamoi. He got shit done). Also, Suiciders; Heeeeellp...mEEeeeeEeeee...
Finally, to people who complained that it wasn't as emotionally affecting as that trailer...come on. You should know by now that a cinematic trailer isn't indicative of gameplay. If you thought this was exactly what you'd be getting, you deserve all the disappointment you get. Anyway, if you want to take a moment to mourn that family in game, take a left when you leave your hotel room right at the start of the game, you can find the parent's corpses in their room. By and large, I'll concede the acting was very OTT and hammy but there was the odd moment I found sad (I'm thinking of the hotel security guard who dies right after you get him morphine). I probably would have found certain scenes more affecting if the character models hadn't strolled right out of Uncanny Valley (I found Jin particularly bad in this respect). I did feel sorry for Jin though, even though she was Too Dumb To Live. On a side note, I was mildly disappointed that the trailer music didn't make it into the final game. I think it would have fitted very well over the end cinematic, bittersweet ending and all that.
The e****t missions weren't nearly as bad as I'd been led to believe. Yes, the characters would sometimes sprint ahead regardless of what you wanted to do but at least if they saw zombies up ahead, they'd usually have the good sense to hang back and let you deal with them. No, I didn't mind these missions at all, I'm not really sure what all the carping is about.
And the pop culture references...oh the pop culture references, they made me giggle in between the adrenaline surges. A doorway, with "DO NOT OPEN. DEAD INSIDE," written on it? I SEE YOU, WALKING DEAD. The names of the trophies/achievements too:
For traveling on foot: CARDIO.
For severing limbs: 'TIS ONLY A FLESH WOUND.
FOr killing many, many zombies: YA RLY (and yes, the symbol for this achievement was a surprised looking owl).
For finding collectible items: MY COLLECTIBLES. LET ME SHOW YOU THEM.
For exploration: THERE AND BACK AGAIN.
For completing the city level: NO RACOONS HERE (I see you, Resident Evil!)
There's more. I'm sure Dr. West is a Lovecraft reference and I'm positive I saw "Zombie Kill of the Week" pop up somewhere but that could have been my fevered, sleep deprived brain filling that in.
So yes, it's flawed but the massive fun you have playing it outweigh those flaws comfortably. Overall, I'd have to say I freaking love this game, to the point where I'll probably need some kind of Dead Island intervention soon ("We're only saying this because we love you but we think you've slaughtered enough walking dead, you have to get back to real life now...no, it's not Kuru, it's just a game").
so congratulations, if you read to the end of this wall of text. You're clearly as obsessed with zombies as I am. I'll see you at the intervention.
Depressing update.
This has upset me quite a bit. I don't usually get that affected by stuff like this but I guess it reminds me of my family and the crap they went through because of this industry.
When I was little, I was aware that my Uncle Jack (not really my uncle, my great-aunt's husband, but you know, to me he was Uncle Jack) walked kinda funny. He had this odd, bow-legged gait. It wasn't until I got older that I found out that his pelvis had been crushed in cave-in. The leader of the rescue team that got him out was my Uncle Tom, his brother-in-law. Imagine going to work knowing that your goal for the day is to stop your sister becoming a widow.
Tom's reward for what he did? Being bed-ridden for the last couple years of his life, hooked up to oxygen tanks as slowly died of emphysema.
Don't mind me. I have nerd rage. Carry on, nothing to see here.
I'm getting really tired of seeing Space Marine being compared to Gears of War. There's throw-away comments every-damn-where but it's the main thrust of this article/op-ed piece/badly researched piece of garbage with an apology/clarification that's longer than the actual piece.
Before I commence this rant, I'd like to make it clear that I'm not ragging on Gears of War. I've heard nothing but good things about it and I think this kind of lazy journalism is insulting to both franchises.
I don't get it. I just don't. If you want to make comparisons (which I think is silly anyway because FPS games are ten a f**king penny these days, they're all derivative) it should really be the other way around because Warhammer 40K's been going in its various forms since 1987 where the first Gears of War game came out in 2006. Spending less than a minute on Google would tell you that.
Oh but since they've ventured into FPS territory, maybe they are ripping-off another, well established-franchise's game mechanics and aesthetics? Well, no.
For a start, Gears of War is cover-based combat. Granted, Space Marine was originally going to be cover-based but at some point during the development the designers said, "You know what? Let's get rid of cover, these are seven-foot-tall, genetically engineered, surgically enhanced human tanks. They don't need cover, they'd laugh at people who use cover." In a standard FPS these days, health is restored by your character taking cover and letting the health restore over time, whereas in Space Marine health is restored by killing enemies in the most spectacular way you can. The game mechanic actively encourages you to charge headlong into the fray like the combat-obsessed religious fanatic you are. The game gives you an incentive to get stuck in there, rather than hiding behind a low wall and sucking your thumb.
Oh but in Gears of War you have a chainsaw bayonet, you have a chainsword in Space Marine. Suck it, chainswords came first and let me tell you, if I, as a long-standing fan of this universe were denied the opportunity to rip into Orkz with a chainsword, I'd be one pissed off little gamer.
They both have power armour? Again, SPACE MARINES CAME BEFORE GEARS OF WAR and again, power armour is hardly unusual in gaming and sci-fi these days so if you pick on it for that, I'm sorry but you're reaching.
At the end of the day, the Space Marine is well-established in this franchise, their look hasn't changed much since the 80's, there are reams of canon explaining where they come from, why they look the way they do, why they think the way they do. If they'd got rid of the elements it had in common with Gears of War, like the power armour, the chainswords and the ridiculously ripped men with no necks, it wouldn't be Space Marine anymore, it wouldn't be Warhammer anymore, which would defeat the point of the entire exercise.
What about aesthetics? Again, I'm just not seeing it. Granted, I haven't played Gears of War but I've seen trailers, read reviews and seen screengrabs (which is ten times more research than that douche-canoe above did) and the colour scheme seems to be grey, green, brown, green-brown, grey-brown and browny-brown. The colour scheme in Warhammer 40K is ALL THE COLOURS OF THE GOD-DAMN RAINBOW. All the Space Marine chapters have their own sigils and colours to differentiate themselves, which is another example of them sticking two meaty fingers up to typical combat conventions. While other troops might use camouflage, a Space Marine will go into battle lit up like a Christmas tree yelling, "I'M OVER HERE, COME AT ME BRO!" Camouflage is for wimps. Orcs are the brightest of bright green, gore flies around in a particularly pleasing shade of crimson and don't get me started on the followers of Slaanesh; they look like they just stepped out of the Notting Hill carnival. The two franchises look completely different but again, like I said above, you couldn't change the look of Space Marine and have it still be Space Marine. There are the game models, the previous video games, reams and reams of official art and textual descriptions from fluff and novels. Anyone with only a passing acquaintance with this universe knows what a Space Marine is supposed to look like. You couldn't change that without completely alienating the fandom.
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