RSS feed blog search engine
 

Hate Red, Dip It  
Released:  3/7/2009 1:53:50 PM  
RSS Link:  http://www.livejournal.com/users/kyoselflove/data/rss/  
Last View 5/23/2012 2:45:00 AM  
Last Refresh 5/23/2012 2:45:02 AM  
Page Views 502  
Comments:  Read user comments (0)  
Report violation Report a violation or adult content
Save It  



Description:



just another fucked up mind, writing fanfiction - LiveJournal.com


Contents:

Fanfiction Archive

♥ fanfiction archive





Multi-chapter



Title - Lessons in Manners [Completed]
Rating - NC17
Warnings - OVERALL: drama, angst, fluff, sex, un-beta-ed, crossdressing, blood, violence, rape, gore, murder, mentions of necrophilia, suicide, character death.
Pairings - Kaoru/Toshiya; Uruha/Aoi , Uruha/Toshiya, Hakuei/Toshiya (One sided), Kaoru/Miyabi (past), Kaoru/OC
Summary - The year is 1807, Toshiya is the son of a wealthy family. He refuses to listen to anyone and does whatever he wants. Until, Kaoru his new teacher makes his arrival.

-Characters Bio's-


[one] [two] [three] [four] [five] [six] [seven] [eight] [nine] [ten] [eleven] [twelve] [Halloween Special] [thirteen] [fourteen] [fifteen]


Title - The Servant's Story [Completed]
Rating - NC17
Genre - AU, Drama, Angst
Warnings - OVERALL: sex, blood, violence, rape, necrophilia, language, murder, character death, un-betaed, maybe more..
Pairings - Uruha/Aoi/Uruha, Aoi/OC, Kaoru/OC, Uruha/Toshiya (Past) more to come
Summary - In the early 1800's Kouyou is a servant for a mansion that belonged to a wealthy family. After a tragic incident, everything turns upside down.
Comments - This is the sequel to Lessons in Manners.

-Characters Bio's-

[prologue] [one] [two] [three] [four] [five] [six] [seven] [eight] [nine] [ten] [eleven] [twelve] [thirteen] [fourteen a] [fourteen b] [fifteen]


[Banner one] / [Banner two]


Title - Shadow in Doubt [On going]
Author(s) - [info]kyoselflove / [info]angeldemon1
Rating - NC17
Genre - AU, Drama, Angst
Warnings - OVERALL: cross dressing, sex, blood, violence, drug use, un-betaed.
Pairings - None yet.
Summary - Its the 1940s. Just when two actors hit it big, many obstacles attempt to bring them down. Will they be able to overcome these obstacles or will it cost them their careers, or their lives even?

[Prologue] [Chapter One] [Chapter Two] [Chapter Three]



Title - For Love/You [Completed]
Rating - NC-17
Warnings - Rape, Prostitution, Alcohol abuse, character death, un-beta-ed
Pairings - Uruha/Aoi, slight Tora/Uruha

[Part one] [Part two]



Title - Good Morning/Afternoon/Night [Completed]
Rating - NC-17
Warnings - Mentions of Prostitution, Alcohol abuse, rough sex, sex in general, angst, fluff, comedy, un-beta-ed
Pairings - Kaoru/Toshiya, slight Kaoru/Uruha
Summary - 'Hopefully I will have a good day.'

[Part one] [Part two] [Part three]





One Shots



Title - Spending Christmas Not Alone
Rating - PG
Genre - fluff, drama
Warnings - None.
Pairings - Slight Kaoru/Uruha (Kouyou)
Summary - It was the fourth year he had spent Christmas alone...
Comments - Dedicated to [info]angeldemon1, she inspired me to make a Kaoru/Uruha fic! Love you <3

[one]



Title - The Ramen Shop
Rating - PG13
Genre - fluff, romance
Warnings - Mentions of sex, un-beta-ed.
Pairings - Kaoru/Toshiya
Summary - 'Would you like to go for a coffee sometime with me?'


[one]


[fic] Lessons in Manners - Kaoru/Toshiya - Dir en Grey - NC17 - Chapter 15
Title - Lessons in Manners
Author - kyoselflove
Word Count - 1.136
Chapter - 15/15
Rating - PG - NC17
Warnings - OVERALL: drama, angst, fluff, sex, un-beta-ed, crossdressing, blood, violence, rape, gore, murder, mentions of necrophilia, suicide, character death.
Pairings - Kaoru/Toshiya; Uruha/Aoi , Uruha/Toshiya, Haukei/Toshiya (One sided), Kaoru/Miyabi (past), Kaoru/OC
Summary - The year is 1807, Toshiya is the son of a wealthy family. He refuses to listen to anyone and does whatever he wants. Until, Kaoru his new teacher makes his arrival.
Disclaimers - Don't own anything but the crappy story! ^.^;
Comments - So this is kind of short sorry, and sad T__T



After two hours of cuddling Kouyou left Toshiyas room before his mother came in. About an hour later his mother came in telling him to get ready for the funeral.

He got off the bed walking to his dresser he put on a loose black dress, the fabric falling off his shoulders. He met up with everyone downstairs, they began walking into the yard, and farther back than the stables was a family graveyard.

Finally they reached their destination; Toshiya saw the wood box placed next to the six-foot deep hole with a priest standing near by. The priest began the service; he looked towards his mother who was crying hysterically then over to Kaoru who avoided his gaze. The whole funeral he did not shed one tear, he was done with crying.

He watched as two servants picked up the coffin and placing it into the hole. As they started to pile pounds of dirt into the hole, Toshiya turned to leave heading back to the mansion.

As he reached the stables he saw Kouyou; the other man smiled at him, he only smiled back and continued walking to his home.

He went straight to Kaorus guest room waiting for his arrival. He lay on the small bed on his back. He pushed his dress up to his thighs just as Kaoru walked in.

One more time for me? Toshiya pleaded stroking his exposed thighs.

Kaoru said nothing as walked to the bed he crawled up so that he could lie between Toshiyas legs. He placed a kiss on the youngers forehead, before kissing him passionately. They slid their tongues against each others. Kaoru pressed his groin into Toshiyas, a moan coming from the both.

Toshiya undid Kaorus pants slipping his dick out. Wasting no time Kaoru slicked his member with his own saliva before penetrating Toshiya slowly. Their pace kept slow wanting to enjoy every moment of their last time.

Kaoru kissed along Toshiyas shoulders and neck that were exposed. Still thrusting leisurely in and out of Toshiya, they were reaching their peak. As they both came, they caught their breaths for a moment, before Kaoru starting thrusting into Toshiya again.

Never forget how much I love you. Toshiya whispered, grabbing Kaorus shoulders tighter.

Never. Kaoru panted, giving a quick thrust into his lover, moaning.

That night they had both came six times, making love all night.

~-----


He awoke an hour before dawn; he simply lay there with a smile on his face as he felt the man behind him. Toshiya felt like he was high on life and happiness, last night had been perfect.

Kaorus arm was wrapped around him; Toshiya squeezed the arm around him with his hands. He wished he could lie like this forever. For the next hour he laid in the embrace wide awake, enjoying every minute.

When dawn finally came, Kaoru stirred waking up. The man behind him pushed up on his elbow to look at Toshiya, and then gave him a small kiss on the lips.

Thank you for the time you have given me. Toshiya said with a smile on his face even though he was silently crying.

You do not have to thank me, but I am so sorry

I will be fine. You should get ready to take your leave. Toshiya rose off the bed finding his dress that was discarded last night putting it on.

Goodbye Kaoru. Toshiya flashed the other man one of his beautiful smiles.

Goodbye Totchi. Now Kaoru was crying.

Toshiya nodded then head out the door heading to his room. He went to his dresser putting on a white spring dress; it stopped right above his knees showing off his long legs. Despite the cold weather outside, he did not seem to care.

As he walked out of his room Kouyou was standing there. Toshiya smiled giving the blonde man a tight hug.

Are you going to be okay? Kouyou asked worriedly.

Yes, you do not have to worry about me, really.

Okay, are you coming to breakfast, Kaoru is going to attend.

No, I have something to do, I already said goodbye. Toshiya smiled then left Kouyou walking the large staircase that was in the center of the mansion.

He walked up the stairs that turned into a metal spiral staircase, the stairs cold on Toshiyas bare feet. They lead to his fathers study, it was the tallest part of the mansion it was in its own tower.

When he reached the door, he noticed it was locked. He banged his body into the door a few times before finally it gave in. The room was rather large; four giant windows were along the walls.

There was a large desk in the middle with papers scattered all over it. He walked towards the desk picking up one of the papers. He skimmed through the document then dropped it when he realized it was a contract to kill. His father was a hit man?

He took a deep breath then looked out the window behind his fathers desk. Looking down you could see the garden. Toshiya opened the large window breathing the fresh air. He smiled, and then he stepped on the ledge outside and turned around. Closing his eyes for a moment still smiling, he fell back.


~---


Kaoru had just finished his breakfast; he walked out of the dinning room to find Kouyou. Goodbye Kouyou take good care of Toshiya for me.

I will. Kouyou nodded towards the older man.

He nodded back then grabbed his suitcase. The carriage was waiting for him. As he was approaching his ride, he looked back towards the mansion; he wondered why Toshiya did not bid him farewell again.

He tried to stop his tears while the servant grabbed his luggage to put into the carriage. Kaoru was about to get in when he heard an earsplitting scream. Quickly he ran to the back of the mansion where the garden was. There he saw Kouyou screaming and crying kneeling near a patch of white carnations.

The closer Kaoru got the more he saw Toshiya lying there. He fell to his knees next to Toshiya, Kouyou got up calling for help running towards the house. Toshiya was on his back, his right hand on his hip, his left hand next to his head, both of his legs straight out and his eyes wide open. Kaoru saw as the beautiful white dress Toshiya was wearing slowly turning crimson from blood.

Kaoru choked a sob he did this to Toshiya. He had never felt so horrible in his life, this was worse then when Miyabi had died. He had caused Toshiya to commit suicide. Kaoru took Toshiya into his arms cradling him to his chest, crying and shouting out to the world.


------

So this is it. THE END!!! So no one probably thought it would end like that huh? Sorry it couldnt be a happy ending >.< I was thinking about making a side story of this fic and have it in Uruha's point of view...what do you think?


[fic] Lessons in Manners - Kaoru/Toshiya - Dir en Grey - NC17 - Chapter 14
Title - Lessons in Manners
Author - kyoselflove
Word Count - 1.181
Chapter - 14/15
Rating - PG - NC17
Warnings - OVERALL: drama, angst, fluff, sex, un-beta-ed, crossdressing, blood, violence, rape, gore, murder, mentions of necrophilia, character death.
Pairings - Kaoru/Toshiya; Uruha/Aoi , Uruha/Toshiya, Haukei/Toshiya (One sided), Kaoru/Miyabi (past), Kaoru/OC
Summary - The year is 1807, Toshiya is the son of a wealthy family. He refuses to listen to anyone and does whatever he wants. Until, Kaoru his new teacher makes his arrival.
Disclaimers - Don't own anything but the crappy story! ^.^;
Comments - Angsty chapter yay, after this chapter there is only one more left T__T




A postman came by to drop off a letter for Toshiya. Opening the envelope, he read that his fathers funeral was being held in exactly a week. Letting out a sigh he looked towards Kaoru.

A carriage is coming to pick me up today so I can go back home for fathers funeral. Toshiya said sadly.

I should come also, to give my regards to your mother. Kaoru said, which put a little hope in the younger ones heart.

Toshiya went back to the room packing his things as he finished the carriage was out front. Kaoru stood by the door with a small suitcase in hand, guessing that he had already said goodbye to his family they headed to the carriage, Kaoru placed his hand out to help Toshiya into their ride.

As they sat there Toshiya was reminded of the last time he was in here with Kouyou. A smile formed on his lips wishing he could do the same with Kaoru. But Kaoru was back to his normal serious mood. The older man was sitting next to him looking out the window.

He placed his hand on top of Kaorus giving it a small squeeze. He noticed the older man did not even reply to the touch. The other man seemed lost in thoughts. This worried Toshiya, he wanted to know what the other man was thinking.

Kaoru, what is wrong? Toshiya said worriedly.

Just thinking.

I can see that, about what? Toshiya pressed.

I do not thinkthat we can do this. Kaorus voice was low.

Toshiya had a tear slip from his eye; he knew that it would eventually come to this. He took his hand away from the other man.

He saw the older man flinch when he took his hand away. Toshiya was confused, the time he had spent with the other the past week he could hardly keep his hands off of him. Now he wanted nothing to do with him.

Then why did you start this? Toshiya shouted.

I should have not done this to you. Kaoru replied with remorse.

Nice answer a*****e! Toshiya was still shouting crossing his arms on his chest.

Toshiya please! I love you, but seriously there is no way this could work out and you know that! Kaoru shouted back.

If you truly loved me this would work out!

Toshiya do not be ridiculous!

Ridiculous? You are the one being so ridiculous!

Kaoru kept silent for a while before he spoke up again. I can not just leave my family, for you. The last two words were just a whisper.

Toshiya was furious now; he balled his hands into fists by his sides. And why not? He let out with a shaking voice.

Because it is not right.

Here you go again saying what is right. Who gave you the f**king power to decide?

God says it is not right.

God! Oh really? Toshiya said with a laugh his mind now losing control.

Tell me, what did god think about you f**king me? Toshiya added.

Toshiya please stop. It is for the best of us, now you can happily be with Kouyou.

Kouyou? What the f**k are you talking about?

You do not think I would notice when you came to my home that you had just laid with him? Kaoru was jealous of his friend.

Oh you have no right to even mention that! Toshiya was sobbing and screaming at the same time.

I figured you only loved me, but it is painfully obvious now.

Shut the f**k up! Who I f**k is my business; I still love you, only you! And you, you f**k Kimiko whenever you please, so shut the f**k up! His throat was becoming sore from all of his screaming, he took a deep breath trying to calm himself.

I am just trying to be normal. Kaoru whispered.

What the f**k is normal? What people want you to be? Be yourself for once!

I am truly sorry, but I have to end this now.
Toshiya looked away from the other man, he felt as though he would vomit. So many hidden emotions were coming out and he had no idea how to handle them. He decided that he needed to get some things off his chest, keep his mind off the break up.

I killed him. Toshiya said slowly keeping his gaze away from his lover.

I know. It was a simple reply that escaped Kaorus lips. Toshiya turned to him looking dumbfounded.

I figured you would end up the one dead, but you proved me wrong. Kaoru said with a sad smile.

Toshiya just stared at the other man as he continued.

When I left that day, I thought I would never see you again. The days that followed not only was I crying from the lost of my child, but for you. At that moment he looked into Toshiyas eyes.

He chained meto a wallin a dark roomfull of dirt Toshiya suddenly became sobbing uncontrollably.

Kaoru just continued his gaze on him, listening intently.

I do not know what came over me, I just grabbed the chain from my neck and choked him. Letting out another sob. When he was dead I felt as if a burden was removed from my conscious, not having to deal with him again. It is so horrible, a son killing his father. You lost a child by illness, and I killed my father by choice. Toshiya was staring blankly at nothing as his mind was fogged.

He felt Kaoru gently place a hand on his upper back in some sort of comfort. Toshiya flinched away from the touch.

Do not touch me! Toshiya was screaming again. You are ending this, the only thing I have to look forward in life, and it is youbeing with you!

Kaoru grabbed Toshiyas chin rather harshly, looking him in the eyes.

I would love to be with you but I can not. At the end of his words Kaoru adverted his gaze.

Toshiya let the other hold his chin; they looked into each others eyes. Then Toshiya realized that after the funeral he would not see Kaoru again.

Kaoru wrapped an arm around him pulling Toshiya closer. The younger man placed his head onto the others chest. Together they began to doze off for the remainder of the ride.

~---


Toshiya went straight to his room then plopping on the bed. It was a few hours from dawn, he had slept in the carriage and now sleep would not come again.

His door opened, he did not see who it was until the bed dipped down and he looked up.

Kouyou. He said with a caring smile.

I missed you. The blonde man said as he pecked Toshiya on the lips.

I know, me also.

How was your time with Kaoru?

Great. Toshiya said spacing out.

And?

And he is leaving after the funeral and not coming back.

I am sorry. Kouyou hugged him while laying down with Toshiya.

Tomorrow is going to be a dreadful day. Toshiya whispered.



-----

so there was that, the next chapter is the end, and expect more angst and sex ^.^


---> Final Chapter


[fic] Lessons in Manners - Kaoru/Toshiya - Dir en Grey - NC17 - Chapter 13
Title - Lessons in Manners
Author - kyoselflove
Word Count - 1.454
Chapter - 13/??
Rating - PG - NC17
Warnings - OVERALL: drama, angst, fluff, sex, un-beta-ed, crossdressing, blood, violence, rape, gore, murder, mentions of necrophilia, character death.
Pairings - Kaoru/Toshiya; Uruha/Aoi , Uruha/Toshiya, Haukei/Toshiya (One sided), Kaoru/Miyabi (past), Kaoru/OC
Summary - The year is 1807, Toshiya is the son of a wealthy family. He refuses to listen to anyone and does whatever he wants. Until, Kaoru his new teacher makes his arrival.
Disclaimers - Don't own anything but the crappy story! ^.^;
Comments - This is a boring chapter...well to me, I hope you guys will like it though.



Home  
 
 




Privacy Policy