Tantrums tend to be a normal developmental phase that every child will go through at some time in their young life. Every child has a different tolerance for dealing with emotions of anger and frustration. Tantrums have numerous stages of intensity, depending on the child, the situation, the various temper tantrums triggers, and lastly how the outbursts are treated by the parents.

The main reason behind temper tantrums is frustration. Small children may not know how to deal with all these different emotions of frustration or anger. They experience what they feel but do not have the emotive maturity to execute these feelings in a calm manner.

It is important to realise why your toddler is having a tantrum, not so much the reason caused by the situation, but more so identify the frustration they are experiencing. Think of a time when you might have felt frustrated, maybe somebody cut you off in traffic, or maybe dinner burned but keep in mind those feelings you felt and in what way you responded to them. Perhaps you shouted, maybe you stomped your feet, or maybe you used some colourful words? Now, I’m not saying that you should accept this behavior from your children, however I am hoping you’ll have a far better idea of what they are dealing with.

With this greater level of understanding comes more patience and sympathy towards your toddler next time they throw a toddler tantrums. You may not ever understand why your child is having a tantrum, as a childs reason for an emotional performance isn’t always how a grownup would rationalise the situation. It is possible to however relate to the feelings that your child is experiencing.

It is crucial for you to stay calm whenever your child is having a tantrum. Leave them to work through their emotions. If you think back to yourself, when you’re feeling aggravated, does it help if someone follows you around suggesting that you are over reacting, and that you should calm down? I would think not. The same is true for your child.

You can have a powerful influence on their behavior by trying your best to stay calm yourself. Should you as a parent also get frustrated and start yelling and screaming, perhaps stomping feet or even smacking, what message are you essentially sending to your child? It is by staying calm (as calm as one can in these testing conditions) that you can assist your child to work through his feelings. When your child has calmed down you could talk to them concerning what has happened, the reason why it happened, and how they think that they could deal with their frustrations better in the future. Stay relaxed at all times, remembering empathy and understanding goes a long way.

The key element to stick to whenever handling a toddler tantrums is to NEVER give into your childs demands. By giving him what he wants, you’re in essence stating that if you act that way for long enough you’re going to get what you want in the long run. I’m able to almost assure you that this will only bring more tantrums in the future.