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Keeping it Simple - LiveJournal.com
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Yeah, I'm surprised I haven't deleted this thing yet. I only really use it to watch and comment on ljsecret.
Blah.
God, it's so hard to lose a loved one.
Mitchell Simmons was the type of guy who constantly had a smile on his face. A lot of the times he came across very shy, at least when I first met him. We were all at Olive Garden for Caitlin, Megan, and Laura Beth's 17th birthday celebration, and Heather had been talking about this guy she'd been "talking to". "He's really sweet", she'd said, "And way adorable. You might know him? Mitchell Simmons...Wayne's little brother?" I told her I hadn't, and I didn't know Wayne from a guy walking down the street, for that matter. "I'm excited to meet him", I'd said, sincerely. He hadn't said much at all...he actually had spent the whole meal looking a little petrified, as we were all kind of loud and obnoxious when we were together. Me, Kallie, and Mitchell were all at the end of the table, sharing awkward jokes amongst the chatter of the couples (which was weird seeing as how he was there with someone) and I forget who had said what, but then we just started cracking up. And there was that smile.
That smile was a little staple of my life as Mitchell had dated Heather. He came "with the territory", if that doesn't sound too weird. It's kind of like a never ending story, you know, the people that you interact with. They're all vital characters in a small way. Megan, Caitlin, LB, and Heather made up so much of my life throughout high school, and those intertwined with them intertwined with me. I was always hearing about the little quirks between him and Heather, how he made fun of her huge appetite, how he took care of her, the funny things he'd said. How we'd all sit in a big group maybe before a volleyball game, just talking and enjoying each others company. I smile when I think about junior prom, and how Heather and I traded partners and I got a dance with him. That's one memory I'll keep with me. But it wasn't just Heather. Megan and Mitchell were amazingly close friends, and I heard my fair share of their wacky conversations that kept them going through anatomy class of my senior year. Caitlin and I would visit the baseball field before our softball games, and it would never fail. Al and Kihm, sometimes with a little Mitchell mixed in. Even if he wasn't always a big part of the conversation, at least in my interaction with him, he was a calming presence. He was always close by in my path through the last two years of school- saying hi to him before he said good-bye to Sarah before band class was a welcome routine during senior year. They made the picture perfect couple. It was just a pleasant time. I don't think I'll ever think of a memory with Mitchell in it that isn't happy.
That all being said, Mitchell and I couldn't be considered "close" by most standards, and I'll be the first to admit it. I don't want in any way to take away from the pain that those much more closer than I are feeling....sure, he was my friend, but for others, he was SO much more, and I regret not having him closer in my life. He was always there, an AMAZING boyfriend to two of the people I interacted with on a daily basis, one a best friend, one a friend I've known since elementary school. He was such a good friend to one of the closest people I've ever had to me in my life, and I thank him for every day she managed to come away from ANATOMY of all classes with a new story and a smile on her face. And because of how he treated the other people who make up my life, I thank Mitchell for the times when those people were feeling their best, because it rubbed off on me too.
Megan, Heather, Kallie and I spent a couple of hours at Famous Anthony's on tuesday night, reminiscing about the things we'll remember about Mitchell. I shared my favorite memory, which was based off of a little "message" I left him with Heather that one day at Laura Beth's(you know what I mean, H ;) ). And then I sat back and listened to story after story. They continue to have so much love for him. It calmed me to see how love still works. And it's strong, so strong, and even if you had no idea of him or who he was, hearing those two talk would make anyone love Mitchell. It would've been impossible not to.
Mitchell Simmons was an amazing person.He lived the way any person should want to, with a good outlook, a kind presence, and most importantly, strong faith. His family should be more than proud of how they raised him. And as cliche as it may sound, I can feel that it's a little bit brighter up there. I think all of us can feel it. Thanks for everything Mitchell...we miss you.
Yes, we did.
I never believed that I would get a chance to make a difference, but I did. I believed in a candidate who is not only charismatic, but intelligent and compassionate to boot. And America chose to believe in him, too.
The last election, my sister and I were called 'f****ts' for choosing to back a democratic president. Throughout the years, we've been ridiculed for choosing to explore all options of a debate, and for being unafraid to voice our opinions. I've been called names ranging from an atheist, a f****t, a heathen, an abortionist, and more, simply because I chose to have an open mind and take the opinions of all people into mind when debating. And just last night...it all changed for me.
Virginia went blue.
I made a difference. My vote... my vote actually counted.
What an amazing feeling, to come so far and still have exponential amount of growth left.
Change I Can Believe in... now actually has the full chance to be Change I Believed In and Saw Happen.
Amazing.
12 days until I move into college.
Go Michael Phelps in the Olympics.
More later maybe.
TDK = FTW
I've had it with a lot of things going on right now.
I had like two paragraphs written out but the more I read it the more it frustrated me. Whatever.
Look at me, look at me...I am changing
I think growth is one of the most important things someone can have in their lives. If people always stayed where they started, the world would be in a sorrier state of affairs then it already is, which would be a scary thing. Anyway.
I am 17 years old, and I am a high school graduate.
I guess the best way to start this would be to reference a particular magnet hanging on our fridge. It's got four different colored little hands and the phrase "Hands are evrey were." I made this magnet when I was in first grade, but it kind of has two meanings right now, in my little realization entry. 1.) I used to be horribly confused when it came to grammar and spelling. 2.) Hands ARE everywhere...I'm the person today because of the people in my life.
For starters, my family. They've taught me some good things and some bad things, and I hope I can obtain half of what they're handing out, willing or not.
My dad is 54 years old. He's a funny, caring person who would talk to a tree if it had the slightest inclination to talk back. He was raised in a southern family with three sisters, so he knows how to treat women and he's handy with directions and he's an awesome cook.. My dad is also really smart- he knows a lot about handiwork and certain things I can't wrap my brain around, and I'm more than happy to learn from him. My dad is a proud man- he loves his wife, his daughters, and others in his life. He's responsible, tidy, and is very good at whatever he sets his mind at doing. That being said, my dad is a proud man. He is a staunch conservative and has old-fashioned authority minded values, and can be extremely stubborn and sensitive. He makes communication hard sometimes.
I've picked up dad's love, humor, his knack for history and being good at what he tries, and stubbornness. I don't mind being stubborn because it means I have the sense to back up what I believe in, even if I also have the sense to realize it can be wrong sometimes. Unwillingly, in the sense that he doesn't know it, my dad has taught me to keep an open mind.
My mom is 51 years old. She has a wry sense of humor, a great personality, and is a hard worker. Mom came from a very complicated family situation and has had to work very hard to keep history from repeating itself. The best thing about my mom is her unconditional willingness to try to please the ones she cares most about, my dad being numero uno. My mom works long hours to provide for the family, and suffers for it by being exhausted when she comes home. However, mom is extremely shy and has a tendency to reserve herself around others. She is also stubborn as hell, and very vague in nature when she says things.
I've picked up mom's humor and "hustle" and a bit of her quirkiness as well. However, I've also picked up her shyness and vague tendencies.
I have three sisters: Lorie, Ginny, and Sammi, who are 28, 25, and 21, respectively. Lorie is extremely intelligent, very musically inclined, and overall a chill, fun person. Ginny is also smart and musically inclined, and has a wide variety of tastes when it comes to many things. Sammi is smart, extremely well versed in pop culture-esque things, and is extremely funny. Lorie also has a tendency to overthink things, can be very impatient, and picks her lips. Ginny has a tendency to shy away from personal things, like hugs and whatnot, and can be very sensitive. Sammi has the tendency to take everything the wrong way, and is constantly 'misunderstood'.
I have picked up every single thing from my sisters, just not as strongly as they have it. I'm smart, I adore music, singing AND hearing, I know a lot of things dealing with older pop culture, I love all sorts of clothes, foods, music, movies, books, etc., and I'm generally chill with a good sense of humor. I also overthink things, take things the wrong way, shy away from personal things [though I do love hugs so I don't have it as bad], pick my lips, and am constantly misunderstood. And, in a combination of their [my whole family] 5 political views, I find myself to be of moderate persuasion.
I am the youngest child.
Even with all these influences in my life, the ones I named, anyway, I am still my own person.
I have my OWN views, standards, affinities, loves, hates, wants, and needs. I'm a proud person. I'm open-minded. I love having several close friends, but it is hard for me to take the first step. I can be extremely sensitive if I overthink what someone says and take it the wrong way.
This train of thought stemmed from me stumbling across my old diaryland page, and a lot of my older LJ entries, even ones within the previous two years. I was a STUPID little kid [little being 13I went through a phase where I wanted to make LJ icons, but received little feedback to go along with the staunch rudeness, and tried to be a different type of person to make LJ friends. I went through a phase where I applied to 'rating communities' to see if I was pretty and cool enough for a bunch of rude b***hes' standards. I went through a phase where I was obsessed with magic, though not to the point where I was growing my own herbs in my bedroom and dressing in flowy outfits. I had trouble telling my parents minor things for fear of the anger or misunderstanding, and was constantly in trouble because of it, because they always found out. I mouthed off a lot, due to my stubbornness, resulting in more trouble. I often fought with my sisters because I was a lot like them, whether they realized it or not, and that resulted in them becoming annoyed with me, or me being annoyed with them. I had and still have poor self-confidence, because I hadn't and haven't realized something until now, that I am and was a beautiful person with a good heart, sense of humor, and most importantly, a good head on my shoulders. I say things that are sometimes pretty dumb, but I make up for it with many more meaningful things. I have a odd body with some pudge, but that doesn't make me any less pretty or genial or unworthy. I'm sometimes overly abrasive, which has led me to say unkind things or judge my friends, and I'm sorry for that, but it happened. I'm also overly trusting and forgiving, which resulted in me once having and still having friends who don't really deserve the title, but has also resulted in me having some friends that will remain close to me and serve as fond memories for the future. My family is loud, quirky, and sometimes obnoxious, but I'm proud of it and I wouldn't trade any of them in a million years. I'm decent at most things I try, and I'm very thankful to be able to do the things that I do, because as of right now I'm healthy and functioning.
I deleted all of those Diaryland entries. I couldn't spell that great all of the time, my entries were things dealing with stupid poems, what I ate for lunch, and words like 'hooker biotch.' b***h. b***h. I can say that and realize that I'm not flawless and sometimes someone is going to be a b***h, and it's ok to say that and type that without being like "OMG I'M SUCHHH A BAD PERSON!!111!!!" Sure, I should've kept the entries for posterity or something like that, but just reading them today and purging them helped me a lot.
I'm just Jamie. I come with baggage, just like anyone else.
And you can go to hell if you can't be mature enough to accept that.
Eff you, TomTom!
Senior trip '08 was a great success.
Uhm, where to begin? We [Me, Caitlin, Megan, Laura Beth, Sarah, and Kristen] got to Williamsburg at around 10 in the morning and were able to check into our room even though the hotel has a 4:00 check-in time so that was a good time. We went to Busch Gardens right after that and got fun passes...go Virginians! We ended up bringing like 30 coupons for $12 off but we couldn't use them for fun passes so we stood at the front of the line and handed out the coupons and we ended up saving one family like $50 so that was cool. The guy making our fun passes thought the name on my license was "Jamie O Ghoover" so that's my name and they have my fingerprint on file as that so yeah.
In total we went to Busch Gardens all day the first day and the next two nights roughly 5-10 so we went a little crazy but yeah. The only roller coaster I rode was Big Bad Wolf, we rode that twice at night and you couldn't see anything...I'm a pansy, they all rode everything except Megan and Caitlin, who didn't ride Apollo's Chariot. We met like 15 guys and we were on the tram last night in the rain and they yelled and asked if Andrew Castro was on and Kristen started screaming "WHY?!?!?! WE KNOW HIM!!!!!!!!!"
We got our hair cut and we went to the bay and all in all it was an awesome trip, a lot of the details are unimportant but it was SO fun.
Sidewalks, running away from the streets we knew
I'm a high school graduate...whoooooot!
That's pretty exciting. I don't really know how to gauge what I feel but it's been a long, weird year. I'm going on a little Busch Gardens/Water Country USA trip with my friends and idk it's just weird. I don't feel any different as a person as far as freshman year to now. Meh..the words just aren't coming right now like I'd want them to be. More later.
Anyway I just saw Ruiz in a teeny little montage on Nashville Star...we're only a few minutes into it so we'll see if there's more.
"Welcome to the real world", she said to me
Condescendingly
Take a seat
Take your life
Plot it out in black and white
Well I never lived the dreams of the prom kings
And the drama queens
I'd like to think the best of me
Is still hiding
Up my sleeve
They love to tell you
Stay inside the lines
But something's better
On the other side
I wanna run through the halls of my high school
I wanna scream at the
Top of my lungs
I just found out there's no such thing as the real world
just to lie you've got to rise above
So the good boys and girls take the so called right track
Faded white hats
Grabbing credits
Maybe transfers
They read all the books but they can't find the answers
And all of our parents
They're getting older
I wonder if they've wished for anything better
While in their memories
Tiny tragedies
They love to tell you
Stay inside the lines
But something's better
On the other side
I wanna run through the halls of my high school
I wanna scream at the
Top of my lungs
I just found out there's no such thing as the real world
Just a lie you got to rise above
I am invincible
As long as I'm alive
I wanna run through the halls of my high school
I wanna scream at the
Top of my lungs
I just found out there's no such thing as the real world
Just to lie you've got to rise above
I just can't wait til my 10 year reunion
I'm gonna bust down the double doors
And when I stand on these tables before you
You will know what all this time was for
Know when to hold them, know when to fold them
I hate...things. I hate people who change, and not for the better. I hate restrictions. I hate feeling so exhausted.
Softball has been very surprising to me this year. We beat the 3x state champs 1-0, only to have them come back and beat us next time 3-2. We lost to Gretna 6-1 and came back and beat them 1-0. Liberty, the supposed 'team to beat' barely managed and come back to beat us 3-2, bottom of the seventh. And yet we lose 3-1 to the worst team in the district. Ugh. We need better offense. For real. For real. FOR REAL.
It's my last 9 weeks of high school. Kind of interesting. Today after school Caitlin and I just went down on the steps just above the lake and talked...it was refreshing. We want to do that more once softball lets out. School's just a drag. I barely did anything of any sort of use and ended up getting straight A's [pretty sure, anyway] the third 9 weeks, which isn't really boding well for school...I mean, I'm in honors classes and everything and how is it that I can get a 97% in AP Gov when I didn't even really understand or care what we were talking about? I did all the work, sure, but whatever. We had to do that stupid senior project, I got a 99% on it so I guess I don't fail at life but who's grading, anyway?
American Idol is pretty cool this year. My favorites are David Archuleta, Carly Smithson, and Jason Castro. David Cook's pretty good but I wish he could sing a song straight for once in his life instead of screwing with every arrangement. Michael John's got an amazing voice but I get this weird vibe from him, like, how you can look at someone and they're hot and nice but you secretly know they're a child molester or something? Idk. Mom loves him and his accent and his singing so she didn't bother to try and get what I meant.
I'm just tired of things. I'm exhausted. Now I need to go to sleep because I have to wake up at 8:00 tomorrow for softball practice. Awesome.
Good morning, Belle
14 years is an awfully long life for a dog, especially a purebred golden retriever. And it was a very, very good 14 years for Belle.
I remember the day we got her. I was laying under the teeny coffee table in our teeny house, back turned to everyone, being the random kid I was. I hear my grandpa's booming voice, "Hey, look what we found in the gutter". I turn around to see a puppy. I was in love.
Belle and I grew up together, kind of like those stories you hear about a girl being raised in a pack of wolves or whatever. We'd run around the skinny hallway in our house, slamming each other into bookcases and wrestling, and falling asleep on the floor. Mom tells me stories about how we'd be out in the yard and they'd throw balls or I'd call her and she'd be running full speed at me, and mom or dad would yell out 'DUCK' but I'd just stand there befuddled while she ran me over. I think Belle maybe bit me once in all of her 14 years and it was because I was too rough with her. She loved to go out in the snow and roll around, and she'd chase snowballs down to the exact spot you threw them and try to eat them.
As she got older, she had hip problems. Arthritis set in about when I was in the 6th or 7th grade but she still chased balls and still had spirit. She was afraid of thunder and gunfire and one day I was running a bath and hadn't gotten in yet and I heard her whining outside the bathroom door. When I opened it, she ran past me, knocked me down, and jumped into the tub. I had no choice but to give her a bath.
These past few years were rough for Belle. I think it was last year, or maybe the year before, we discovered she had a spleen tumor, a big one. We thought that was going to be the end, but with the help of our awesome vet, Belle made the best recovery she could and was good for awhile. But ear infections combined with arthritis and some minor hip dysplasia[sp?] got to her. She would go for periods of time without eating, without walking, and we'd tend to her the best we could. Everything was a temporary fix, and eventually it caught up to her. We took her to the vet on Saturday and found out that her kidneys were shutting down, her eyesight was as poor as it ever was, that the best possible thing we could do would be to put her down. I fought it, of course. But it had to be done. It was no life of her to lay around while we had to struggle to carry her around, and feed her the only thing she'd eat- lunch meat.
I spent most of yesterday laying outside on our basketball court beside her, taking in the sun and rubbing her all over. Mom gave her a warm bath and massaged her useless back legs.
School today was tough. And I thought for sure I would be able to go in the vets office with my parents today. But I couldn't. When I got home I laid down on the floor and put my arms around her. We all said our goodbyes and I carried her out to the jeep and put her in the back with Mom, and I gave her a long hug goodbye.
The people from the vet are bringing her back tomorrow, and we're going to bury her out in our rose garden.
My only regret is that maybe I didn't spend as much time with her as I should have, wasn't there for her if she was lonely. But I think I did the best I could have to make her feel at ease in her last days. She was an awesome dog, and I'm going to miss her very, very much. Love you Belle.
I LOVE DAVID ARCHULETA
I LOVE DAVID ARCHULETA
I LOVE DAVID ARCHULETA
multiply that by 3094793270327594375432759843275-4327543275974325974325894326532185642
and jason castro and david hernandez are pretty sweet i'm not gonna lie
No ice, no school = rofl.
Why can't I graduate but go to college with all my friends?
Softball starts monday. I am so not in shape.
In other news, I have caught the death. Just in case you wanted to know.
"If I don't make it I love you"- times of desperation, I sound crazy
Ugh, my power finally came back on at 10:30 after it'd been out since 3 on Sunday...I'm grateful for it being back especially since it wasn't supposed to be back until about midnight, tuesday. As in almost wednesday. I'm still freezing though, my house isn't even back to 60 yet.
Eh, it embarrasses me to look back at my entry from the other day, I get emo way too much. Poor emo kid, like Shawn informs me. But yeah.
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