Eko ahem, dvitiyo na asti; na bhooto, na bhavishyati. - LiveJournal.com
Contents:
As instructed....
Aj had his first dart match with K today. The scores were:
Aj: 988 K: 1240
I have also been instructed to point out how close the match was, even though he was playing with his 5-yrs-older sister. I strongly suspect you all are supposed to be highly impressed and complimentary. :)
Today...
....needs to be marked. For it is the first time I have ever danced in heels. :)
Just one song, mind you. But I did it. And I didn't break any legs or ankles.
I am pleased. :)
Is good....
A dust storm blew up a short while ago. The sky is a peculiar orange brown and the wind so fierce that I've had to secure every door and window in the house and they still rattle. And as I stood in my balcony, offering support to tall and tender saplings, I realised anew that there is exhilaration in the violence of storms....
And now the wind carries more than dust and grit. It carries the scent and feel of water. We might just get luckier... :)
There is an outbreak of viral fever in my home. :( The kids and I have high fever, colds, coughs, congested chests and cranky dispositions....and it leaves me feeling so weak. Gah. Bah. Pah. Aaargh. There would have been more emphasis and emotion but I am far too tired and sleepy to bother...plus, my garden is watered and I'm going back to bed.
H&R 1
I will be doing a lot of 'Hit and Run' posts...things are a bit hectic on a couple of fronts...the sprog is ill, my Angela is ill, the work load is a bit heavy....
Anyway, Amir Khan's 'Satyamev Jayate' was launched yesterday and apparently the first episode was on female foeticide. I hear it was a reasonably decent episode [no, I didn't watch it - see above] - well researched, hard-hitting. I was trawling a few sites to gauge the reactions to the same...and...
*Urk*
I came across a spate of emo comments like "I am a girl. Than you Ma and Pa for not killing me! I am so grateful". Never mind that it sounds far too Oprah-ish to be palatable, but, really, isn't that an anti-thesis of the entire issue?
Instead of focusing on the crime and how to stop it, people seem to be indulging in an orgy of sentiment over not being victims. And that tends to elevate the crime to the point of the norm.
I am wondering how long Amir will have hair on his head....
So I bought meself my first pair of heels today. :)
3 inches! Which means I top 6 ft when I wear them. Things noticed so far:
- They shift my centre of gravity, it moves lower and I tend to do the 'lead from the hips' model walk. - They do amazing things for my legs - They are not quite as hard to get used to as I had feared.
Heh
Aj fishes out a circular from his bag and hands it to me. I skim through it and hand it back.
Aj: They said to give it to you. R: You have. Aj: So what is it? R: A circular about a workshop.
Aj wanders off until he locates the room K has locked herself in.
Aj, shouting: K, did you get a circular from Amity Centre for Educational Research and Training? K : What is this centre about? Aj: It says it is a centre dedicated to educators and parents. K: Tell me more. Aj: It says "Workshop on 'Read to me Mom and Dad - The importance of early language stimulation and fostering early reading habits in children'". In the second para, they talk about the development of speech, language and cognitive skills. K: Do you think Mum needs it? Aj: Only if they invite her to train their trainers.....
So that is sorted then. :)
I remember trying to post an entry on Sunday night, something about hoping for an easy week. Something came up and I am already half-way through Thursday. So that is that.
Last night, right before I went to bed, a political debate caught my interest. In a well-enunciated, devastatingly analytical critique of the government, Baba Ramdev called the members of the Parliament "murderers and dacoits". A member of the Parliament, the de-facto national personality, Laloo Prasad Yadav issued a detailed blistering rebuttal to the charges and called Baba Ramdev "mental".
I almost couldn't keep up with the intricacies of the exchange....
An old love that has survived the vagaries of time. :) There are few things that I enjoy, and have enjoyed, more than the study of political theory. The constructs and their clash with reality, the wrong-headedness and the rare sensible statements, ideas that have made me rage and vent, ideas that have made me cry because they are so utterly beautiful.
I didn't realise it then, I studied and followed political theory for the sheer love of it, but somehow, somewhere, it made me see more clearly. Love, they say, always bears fruit. This love of mine enabled me to separate issues from emotions, feasibility from propaganda...and all rather sneakily at that.
Draupadi
Draupadi, for me, is the ultimate woman of mystery. We know very little about her. Who was she? Whence she came from? Why did she appear in the sacrificial fire when no one had asked for a daughter?
What we do know about her is intriguing:
- She was Krishna's sakhi, and it was the only relationship in her entire turbulent life that she was able to depend upon. That he needed her to reach his goals is indubitable, why she agreed to an entire life of 'trial by fire' is what we do not know. - She was steel and she was fire. Very few would have borne what she had to bear. 5 idiotic husbands, public humiliation, a life filled with discomfort, abduction, attempted rape, the death of her children and her brothers and her father....and not only did she bear it all, she stayed intact, more or less, through all of it. - The great war of Kurukshetra seems to have been her raison d'etre. If it was Krishna's mission to rid the earth of powerful Kshatriyas with no self-control, hers seems to have been to ensure that Krishna's tools for the great war were kept together and on slow burn until it was time to launch that war.
So who was she and where did she come from and why did she love Krishna so much that she agreed to live the life of Draupadi? I do not know.
Delhi
Home :) Power - historical, political. Delhi is not an easy place to live in, I hear. It is a city of VVIPs and everything is skewed by that much power in one place. But for me, it has become home. My Delhi is a mix of seven different Delhis and its most modern avatar is the one I know the least about. I need help to figure out where one goes to eat, or to party, or to shop. But I know a reasonable amount about different neighbourhoods through different eras and centuries.
Tamil cuisine (be honest)
I know *nothing* about it. :)
Greek Mythology
Fun. Another old love, one that my daughter has picked up recently. But, I must admit, I know much more about Indian mythology...
Anything about Haryanavi People =)
We are a contrary bunch. :) Not terribly obedient or trusting. Ego and pride are major issues, and with a dominant Jat population, the things we tend to take pride in are incomprehensible to those not raised here. For example, sometime around the end of February, there was a Buffalo fashion show. As in Buffaloes walked the ramp and flower petals were showered upon them and they were adjudged on their gait and vital statistics....
Your favourite vacation spot
Kashi. :)
It soothes me and invigorates me. There is something about that city that calls me, something about it that I respond to very very strongly, at a level that goes far beyond the conscious and the rational.
I am incredibly predictable when I go to Kashi. I check-in to my hotel and then I go out for a long, solitary boat ride. It helps me slip into the rhythm of the city and then I do what feels right. Mostly it involves exploring the riverfront, talking to random strangers, long periods of silence as I gaze at the river. It also seems to involve the creation of a Kashi mafia - I've met people there with whom I share a mutual bond - a deep, abiding love for the city. They treat me like family and vice-versa. And they keep informed about what is happening there and to whom. :)
It is also, for some reason that I do not comprehend, the only place on the planet where random strangers assume that I am at home. People ask me where I am from and I say Delhi. And the next question is always, "So when did you leave Kashi for Delhi?" And I simply give the date of my last visit and they nod and tell me that I am so obviously a citizen of Kashi that there is no point in mentioning Delhi as my home.
And they are right. If my first home is the place of my birth and childhood, my second home the city where I live and raise my kids, Kashi is my ultimate home. The one place where I never feel out of place, where I am yet to meet a stranger who remained a stranger. It is the place I will retire to, the place I will die in. It is the home I carry inside my heart, the home my entire being has chosen for me.
So...
I took three young 'uns on two clothes-shopping trips this weekend. We shopped for outfits and accessories and shoes...and spent around 7 hrs over two days. And it was fun. :)
There will be pics of three kids in their new outfits before this week is over...and for myself, I bought a chiffon sari in molten amber, with a thin soft-gold border. It makes me grin. :)
The pic below was taken at around 1.30 am, after I got back from the party. I was a bit worse for the wear...but I did enjoy the outfit and have no idea when I will get the other pics taken at the party....
At the break of dawn....
....around 8 am or so, the sprog woke me up to ask about the party. So as I sleepily filled him in, he asked if there were kids there. Nope, I said, except for one baby who was in her mum's tummy...
Aj: One shouldn't party when one is pregnant. R: Huh...? Aj: Just said one shouldn't party when one is pregnant. Too tiring for the mother and thus, the baby. R, blinking, staggered, articulate: Huh? Aj: Now that we are talking about pregnancy.... R, inside her head: We are..? Aj: I might as well tell you.... R, inside her head: How many years did I sleep? He still *looks* seven.... Aj: Amy is pregnant. R: Who's Amy? Aj: Doctor Who....something, something.....Amy.
By then I was well and truly up. :)
This & That
A very satisfying day. And the evening brought rain filled clouds and a strong wind. Soft rain mists down...
And while teasing my friend with the possibility of rain at her open-air party tomorrow, I was reminded that a wet chiffon sari would be a bit too Yash Chopra and so I'd better pray for a lack of rain...old friends are a special blessing. :)
Normal services interrupted for a SQUEE!!!!!
Ahem. One of the meetings today, along with the cheque, I got a wrapped box, "a small gift to show our appreciation" their MD said. And Aj just got me to agree to open the package 10 minutes ago. And it is an iPad 2...white, slim, and quite simply oh-so-cool. 'Tis my first Apple product and the packaging and the lightness and the look...I think I am beginning to understand why there are so many Apple fans out there....I shall start playing with it soon..and see what I can do with it...
Whew!
Aj: Mum? R: Yes? Aj: Your pregnancy test came positive, right? R and K, almost shrieking: What? When? How? Aj: Your pregnancy test came positive, right? R and K: When? Aj: Before K and I were born. R, exhaling: Yes, yes, of course.
I prolly should ask him where he heard of a pregnancy test but not today....
Wisdom of my F-List
My oldest friend and one of the people I love the most in the world is throwing a party to celebrate something that means a lot to her. The guests will be her friends and colleagues, age group : mid-thirties to mid-fifties. The venue is one of Delhi's oldest clubs.
Her instructions for the dress code were: "Formal but fun. No restrictions. ;)"
What does it mean? Give me a word to describe the look, please. I have never uttered the words 'formal' and 'fun' in the same sentence and am wondering what it could possibly mean.
Traditional? Bohemian? Sensuous? I know it can't mean 'corporate' and it will have to be reasonably dressy. What, in your opinion, would the glam quotient be?
All thoughts and wibbles welcome.
ETA: Sorted. :)
A sinful cream and gold blouse with a light turquoise chiffon sari [with cream and gold flowers appliqued here and there]
Good morning :)
When I woke up this morning, at around 6 am, the sky was clear and the sun fresh in the sky. By the times the kids and I left our home, there were clouds and a soft, cool breeze.
It started raining on my way back home....and I got thoroughly drenched during a conversation with random strangers about the effect of rain on the wheat crop.
Now the skies are grey, thunder mumbles gently and the rain falls softly.
It is all so very beautiful that I'd put on some music...but I want to hear the rain fall....
ETA: My other hibiscus is proudly displaying its first flower. As is the adenium. :)
In which I pontificate....
A variation on the questions meme - topics are given and you write on them. Don't worry, there are no essays lurking behind the cut. ;)
One of the very few phenomena that validate a lack of solitude. A seduction tool part excellence. Something I have sought constantly over many decades.
My life, it seems, has been filled with conversations - with other people, with ideas, with authors, with myself. As a medium of exchange of ideas, conversation seduces me. If a person can't hold my interest with words, they don't get slotted into my life. But it actually has to be a conversation - not a regurgitation of statements or pointless jabber or mere pontification. Conversation for me means a two-way flow of thoughts, ideas, experiences; it needs to be organic - not two people taking turns spouting stuff - but an honest engagement which may or may not throw up a fresh perspective. Else, I am quite likely to sit with a smile and not say a single word out loud.
Lately, conversation has become noise. Not always but often enough. And it has nothing to do with anyone else but me. All that I said above, all that which was once a defining part of my life, it has changed. I often find myself reluctant to engage in conversations because conversations produce internal noise. Thoughts need to emerge, and once they emerge, they buzz around my head. I have discovered silence... and I have been thoroughly seduced by silence. I lack the words to explain it but it feels something like this - at a point in meditation [or through the day], all is calm and quiet, and there is not a ripple within. Just silence...and a stillness...vast, peaceful, profoundly joyous. And that is the point where I live in the now, where each moment is an eternity, where an eternity is but a blink of the eye. Thoughts, ideas, words - they are all limiting and limited when compared to that.
Money:
It exists. It has its uses. It can be earned.
Reading:
See what I said above for conversations. It used to be the biggest thing in my life, a passion, an obsession, a need. Words and worlds and stories and characters and ideas....but now it feels limiting when compared to the silence. Oh, I still read, and I still love reading - but it is no longer an obsession. Somewhere over the last year, it turned from an obsession into a pleasurable activity, a tool of research, a way to unwind, a way to learn about something.
This change is so vast, in my world and from my perspective, that I'd find it staggering if it didn't feel so very right. I can walk by a bookstore without peeping in, I can enter one and gaze at the shelves and walk out again. At one level, it surprises me still. At another, I just note the fact that reading is no longer necessary for me.... and I smile.
Relationships:
My views here are in a state of flux. And I am not quite clear about what relationships mean to me today.The nebula around this word does indicate a few pointers: Some links are meant to be, for reasons I can't quite comprehend, and they remain. Others have a time limit and then you grow apart. There is but one relationship that lasts and holds - the one between atma and paramatma. The relationships that last are different channels of this one relationship; others are functions of growth and learning....and thus are momentary reflections of the primary relationship.
If I look back at what used to think, I suspect a large part of what we call relationships are nothing more than the human tendency to cling, to find permanence in illusions.
Travel:
Fun. Invigorating. Exploration.
I have always loved to travel and that hasn't changed. Every time I go to a new place, I expect that place to offer me its best. And it does. Through locals who love their city enough to show me the best of it, through the aura of the place, through stories I had never heard before, through experiences that enrich my being.
Weather and climate:
They exist. And each flavour has its beauty. On a personal level, I'd take heat over cold any day [and I will reverse that statement as soon as proper summer arrives here].
The patterns do seem to be getting messed up though and that worries me.
Worthwhile uses of time:
Anything I choose to do with my time is a worthwhile use of my time. :)
Meditation. Watching my children and my garden grow. Learning. Reading. Writing. My work. Listening to music. Cooking and crotchet. Dancing. Talking to those I love. Letting silence envelope me. Random conversations with random strangers. Letting the world come to me. Being with people whose company I enjoy.
Everything that nourishes me....and I am learning to build a life that nourishes me. :)
If you want topics to write on, please do say so in the comments.
And investigations are on to see if I can grow tuberoses in my garden. I love the flowers and their fragrance but feel vaguely guilty about buying them. If I can grow them in pots, I can simply put a pot or two in each room. And enjoy them without killing them. :)
Je t'assure...
...I did get back. 'Tis just that I expected a lazy day today and those expectations were belied. A couple of somethings have popped up, all seem interesting and I suspect normal services shall resume once I have thought these somethings over/prepped for them.
There is a lot that I've meaning to say...and it will just have to wait.
In other news, my b'day presents from the kids have started arriving. I have been gifted 5 Dr. Who books that the kids *really* want to read. And as Aj put it a week or so ago, they will order them and let me pay for them and since they are my b'day gifts, I can even read them once the kids are done reading them. :)
I daresay I couldn't get a better deal anywhere else. ;)
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